Unfiltered Lessons

Lunar+solar eclipse season, met with cardinal signs ending their 16-year karmic cycle (thank the LORD), means this chicken nuggie is unhinged and in her villan era. But nothing makes authentic A+++ content than that sort of vibe. The past couple weeks have been wild, frantic, and called for an immense of growth beyond the thick-skin. There's an on-going joke within the family that I really should have pursued law for my abilities to reason, fight, debate, and win a conversation. But here we are, choosing a different path because I feel strongly aligned with where I am heading. As a mortal, I am thankful for the moments when I feel extra unhinged. Today is one of them.

Not Everyone Will Be Supportive of Your Endeavors

One of the harsh realities of pursuing your passions is that not everyone will support your journey. In my case, some family members have always viewed me as competition, often green with envy. While they were initially thankful when I chose a career in the performing arts—seeing it as an opportunity for their own children to shine more or a chance to piggy-back off my achievements—their love and appreciation felt conditional.

This lack of genuine support can be disheartening, especially when you’re investing time and energy into something meaningful. However, it’s essential to recognize that your dreams and ambitions belong to you, not to others. There comes a point in your life when you need to upset a few people (or, in my case, an entire lineage) and do what is culturally frowned upon for a late-30s female.

Sometimes, you will need to walk away from relationships to pursue your vision. Most of the time, all you need are two best friends and a dog to keep you moving forward. I’ve always lived life with a "positive projection" approach, viewing challenges as opportunities and thinking about things in a linear way. Surrounding yourself with individuals who share your passion or can offer constructive feedback is vital. Your vision is important because, when things get tough, it’s what gets you going. Building a network of like-minded friends can help bolster your confidence and inspire you to keep pushing forward.

Moreover, learning to rely on your inner strength and intuition becomes crucial in this journey. Not everyone will understand your path, but that doesn't mean you should let their doubts dictate your choices. Embrace the journey, focus on your vision, and remember that you have the power to shape your narrative. Ultimately, creating a supportive environment is key to thriving in your pursuits, regardless of external opinions.

Fear Kills More Dreams Than Failure Ever Will

One of the most significant obstacles we face in pursuing our passions is fear. Fear of judgment, inadequacy, the unknown, and even fear of developing new skills can paralyze us, preventing us from taking essential steps toward our goals. This fear distorts our perception, making us believe that avoiding potential failure is the safest option, but it can steal opportunities for growth and achievement.

Growing up, I struggled with intense anxiety surrounding competitions and auditions. Self-doubt crept in before I stepped onto the stage, leading me to question my abilities and worth. Part of this anxiety stemmed from my cultural upbringing, where the pressure to make my family proud loomed large, overshadowing my aspirations.

Looking back, my biggest regret is allowing fear to hold me back. There were moments when I hesitated to put myself out there, fearing I wouldn’t meet others’ expectations. The fear is still present, but I’ve learned to quiet that voice through strategy and luck. By setting realistic goals, preparing thoroughly, and seeking support, I’ve found ways to manage my anxiety and turn fear into a driving force.

Today, there is so much emphasis on results, validation, trophies, and titles, often making achievements our entire identity. This focus can be detrimental, turning our journeys into a race rather than a meaningful exploration of our passions. When we tie our self-worth to external validation, we risk losing sight of what truly matters—the love for our craft and the joy of learning.

True growth happens when we push past our fears and step outside our comfort zones. Taking risks—whether auditioning for a role, launching a new product, or learning a new skill—requires courage. It’s in these moments of discomfort that we discover our capabilities and resilience.

Ultimately, living with the regret of inaction can be more painful than the experience of failure itself. By reframing fear as an opportunity for growth, we can transform it into motivation. The only true failure lies in never trying at all. Embracing the risks that come with pursuing our dreams is essential for unlocking our full potential. Remember, our journeys should not be measured solely by trophies but by the experiences we gain and the joy we find along the way.

I’ve Learned That Things Are Transactional

One of the most significant lessons I’ve learned on my journey is that many relationships are transactional. People often offer support, validation, or encouragement only when it serves their own interests or benefits them in some way. For example, certain family members may have celebrated my accomplishments in the performing arts, but their support often felt conditional, rooted in how it reflected on their own status or that of their children.

I’ve also encountered situations where emotions are manipulated for personal gain. In these instances, individuals may feign concern or support while secretly pursuing their own agendas, creating a toxic environment that can leave you feeling used or undervalued. This realization can be disheartening, as it’s easy to feel disappointed when the encouragement you expect is tied to what you can provide rather than genuine care for your well-being.

Recognizing this dynamic allows you to navigate your connections more wisely. It’s crucial to be discerning about who you allow into your inner circle. Surrounding yourself with individuals who genuinely value your journey, rather than those who seek to benefit from it, fosters a healthier and more uplifting environment.

Understanding that not all relationships are built on mutual support encourages you to prioritize connections that inspire and motivate you. Ultimately, focusing on genuine interactions over transactional ones is essential for cultivating a strong support system and thriving in your endeavors.

In Conclusion

Looking back, it’s clear: not everyone’s gonna root for you—some just want to steal your spotlight. Fear? It’s a dream killer, and I’m done letting it win. And let’s be real: relationships can be more transactional than a bad business deal. What do I know? I’m just here surviving to pay taxes!

S.